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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28297488">set phasers to...something</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ratbrain/pseuds/ratbrain'>ratbrain</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>"I'm claiming Jon Sims for the neurodivergents" [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Magnus Archives (Podcast)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist Has ADHD, Set in Episodes 159-160 | Scottish Safehouse Period (The Magnus Archives), they watch star trek</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:55:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,662</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28297488</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ratbrain/pseuds/ratbrain</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jon starts to hyperfixate on Star Trek, but he feels insecure about showing it around Martin due to past negative experiences. But he wants to at least try.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>"I'm claiming Jon Sims for the neurodivergents" [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2020882</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>112</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>set phasers to...something</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>content warnings!!<br/>- internalized ableism (like a shit ton of it, this is the archivist after all)<br/>- mentions of past experiences of ableism <br/>as always, if I miss any content warnings please feel free to let me know!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>One of the first things that Jon noticed about the safehouse was how it changed his attitude towards television rather quickly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Granted, he admittedly had never been a huge fan of it in the first place. He much preferred books, although when a book had an accompanying movie or television show he found he could often sit still enough for it (whether it be a good or bad adaptation, because there were definitely many of both). He would watch the shows his friends recommended, few and far between as they were, but nothing ever really stuck. And by the time he was working at the Institute he was dealing with so many other things that it was unlikely he ever even turned his television on once in the final few months leading up to their escape to the safehouse. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And sure, there were plenty of books in the safehouse. Not to mention one of the shops nearby kept a surprisingly good quality collection of mysteries and fiction. Neither subject had ever really jumped out at Jon, but he knew the last thing he wanted to do at a time like this was get picky. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So in between the books he’d taken up the habit of flipping through the channels on the television. At first it had been nothing, just some background noise while he did other things. But slowly but surely, he was becoming more accustomed to it. And he didn’t even really think he minded it anymore. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’re you watching?” Martin asked, sitting down on the sofa next to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon looked up, and ‘hm’ed for a second before answering “Oh, just Star Trek.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon had been expecting a mundane reaction, but instead Martin’s entire face lit up as he said “Wait, really? I didn’t even think they played it anymore! God, I used to love this show!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” Jon asked, surprised. Martin had never mentioned it before. Had he? Granted, there was always the chance that Martin had told him and he just wasn’t paying attention. He really hoped that wasn’t the case. But also it was pretty unlikely that Star Trek had ever come up in their conversations before, so it was probably safe to assume that he wasn’t in the wrong for asking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh yeah, it used to come on every night at eight and it would stay on until midnight. I used to show up to school so tired because I’d been watching it the night before.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, they’ve been playing it the past few days. I’ve been watching it a bit and I kind of like it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Spending too much time with me finally turn you over from your precious world of academia into sci-fi pop culture?” Martin joked. “Next thing I know you’ll be asking to watch Doctor Who with me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe I’ll do it just to spite you,” Jon said, jokingly crossing his arms at Martin’s remark. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The conversation died down after that, with the two settling down to watch the show and only an occasional remark about one of the actors or cheesy special effects said between them. But in Jon’s mind, as often was the case, too many thoughts were racing at once. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>See, Jon hadn’t been entirely truthful in his remark about being casually interested in the show. He was at least self aware enough to realize the warning signs of a hyperfixation, and he was not having it. Normally he could get away with it, just think about it a lot to himself or write things down about it. Before the Institute, well, before the bad parts of the Institute, he could normally find people online to discuss his interests with, and it was large enough of a group that he could feel like he wasn’t being a burden to anyone (“Oh, you know how he is,” the good meaning words of Georgie still rang in his mind, “says he won’t read it but you know in a few weeks it’s all he’ll talk about.” No, no she had meant well. After all, it wasn’t like he had ever actually thought to sit down and talk things through with her, so she had no intentions of hurting his feelings.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But now they were alone, which meant that the only other person he could talk to about these things was Martin. And it wasn’t that he didn’t want to. On the contrary, when he looked around or they had a conversation, he thought of so many things he could say about it. When the kettle was boiling, he wanted to mention how it sounded just a bit like the sound effects used whenever the doors on the Enterprise slide open. When they went for a walk and saw those beautiful flowers he wanted to point out how they looked remarkably similar to the ones Kirk had admired in the latest episode they’d watched. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He couldn’t do that to Martin. He didn’t want to annoy someone who was already sacrificing a great deal by being with him. Jon knew he wasn’t always the best of people (he had been told on more than a few occasions that he was setting unrealistic expectations for himself, but that didn’t matter) and he wouldn’t make that worse by annoying Martin. Because then Martin would realize that if you actually took a good look past the exterior of him that everyone else created that was great and clever and intelligent, that underneath that all he was nothing more than knowledge and greed and a nuisance. (“Honey, I love you but can we please talk about something else now?” His grandmother would say, as always trying so hard but her patience wearing so thin underneath her words). </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But, as seems to always happen with things like these, everything got screwed up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because no matter how careful Jon tried to be, he always did something wrong. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because that was just how it worked with his stupid little brain, wasn’t it? One thing just made him insanely happy because he, what, he couldn't take in things normally? It wasn’t like he’d asked for a fucked up brain that would drive away those he loved. Oh, there he went again, blaming his brain because he couldn’t take responsibility for his own actions. He just-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jon? Did you hear what I said?” Martin asked, concern ever present in his eyes. He and Jon had just spent the last few minutes jokingly passing ideas about Spock back and forth, and the realization of what he’d done was slowly settling over him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-no I’m sorry, what did you say?” Jon asked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I asked if you were alright, you seem a bit tense,” Martin said, slowly bringing a hand down to rest on Jon’s shoulder like he was going to flinch away. He didn’t, but he also didn’t think he deserved it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon nodded, then sighed. “Yes, I’m fine. It’s just-” he wanted to be honest. He wanted to be </span>
  <em>
    <span>better </span>
  </em>
  <span>this time. He could do this. “So there’s this weird thing my brain does, right? It’s called hyperfixating, basically the neurotransmitters in my brain don’t take in and produce dopamine at a normal rate, and so consequently when my brain finds something that produces dopamine it latches onto it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, yes I’ve read about that!” Martin said, seeming a bit too happy at the situation, but Jon just smiled at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You have?” he asked, a weird warmth of affection spreading in his chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A bit. I’ve been reading up on neurodivergency in general, but that’s beside the point. You were saying?” he asked, motioning for Jon to continue. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon took a few seconds to process all of that, and the many feelings it brought him. He blinked and cleared his throat before saying, “Oh, yes. So, when I’m fixated on something it can be very...overwhelming. Like, thought consuming. And I worry that you’ll think I’m irritating,” he looked down at his hands in his lap as he quietly spoke that last part. It hurt to admit it, but at the same time a part of him felt like he was right to say it, which made him feel at least a tiny bit better. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, you know I love listening to you talk.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, but, but this is different. And this is </span>
  <em>
    <span>your </span>
  </em>
  <span>show, I don’t want to feel like I’m taking that away from you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“First off, Star Trek isn’t my show, it belongs to the network-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Very funny,” Jon said flatly, but he was smiling a bit as he spoke. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But you know what I mean. Why would I dislike you liking a show that I enjoy?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Exactly, I know, it’s stupid," Jon muttered, beginning to regret this whole conversation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No no I didn’t mean it like that!” Martin quickly backtracked, “I’m not trying to insult you or imply that you’re stupid, I would never, I’m just trying to understand what’s upsetting you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon laughed, but there was no real amusement behind it. “Been trying to figure that one out for my whole life,” he said dryly, because he knew there was no real sense behind it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, look. I like that you like the same show as me. It makes me happy when we talk about it together. If you’d rather not then that’s your choice but know that I would never be angry at you for it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon sighed again. He could do this, be open and all that. Well, he could try. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right. That’s,” he said, pausing as he tried to find the right word, “that’s good to know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Martin smiled at him, and there were a few more moments of silence before he spoke again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know, you do kind of remind me of Spock-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh don’t even start,” Jon said, and the two began hysterical laughing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And if that remark ended in a ten minute long discussion over Spock’s character, then that was for no one else to know but them. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Honestly I mostly chose Star Trek for this because <br/>1. I love Star Trek so it's easy to recall details (like I once wrote an essay for someone in an hour on an episode without needing to look it up)<br/>2. The only British shows I know are The Inbetweeners and Doctor Who, and The Inbetweeners is honestly terrible <br/>3. Let Jonathan Sims be a sci fi nerd</p></blockquote></div></div>
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